Alchemy of the In-Between

Healing Conversations - Reflections Series

Dear Friends, thank you so much for reading these blog posts and sharing your own reflections in the comments. I am always grateful to hear from you as we continue to build community. The way through these times is together.

I sit at my altar in the gathering darkness, candle lit, offering prayers that I hope will somehow make a difference. I imagine them flying out my window like numinous birds, traveling through the streets of Oakland and out into the ethers where they join other prayers, join chants and spells and longings and wishes from every corner and continent, forming a murmuration of loving magic to enfold the planet. Prayers streaming ribbons of color, like the sunset now painted across the sky, or falling like tender rain to nourish parched ground. I send prayers on the wind to enter the nostrils of every breathing soul upon this Earth, to root themselves like stubborn seeds in every heart and mind. May they grow, these prayer-seeds, may they flourish and flower and bear healing fruit.

We stand at a threshold. The structures of a world built on domination and division are crumbling, but still fighting hard to hold on. Each day brings news of the latest abuses of an oligarchic regime, news of devastating violence, ecological catastrophe, and social collapse. It can be tempting to disconnect in order to ease the intensity of the pain, to distract or numb ourselves in all the ways we do. The answer, however, is not to disconnect, but to connect more deeply. To find strength in something more powerful than the chaos: our belonging to a wholeness that is ancient, infinite, and eternal. We can engage the transformative potentials within the upheaval as a portal into another way of being. We can live with purpose and meaning, not just in spite of the rising tide of calamities around us, but as our response to them. When old worlds are dying, new ones can be born. That is the real opportunity available to us in these times.

Nature’s cycles show us the way: turning that which has died (or needs to) into the compost that nourishes emerging life. There is a r/evolutionary power available in the midst of chaos. It’s achingly hard to be here, yet in this place is our hope. In it is the pivot point—if we will take it.

Poet and cultural theorist Gloria Anzaldúa wrote about the richly nuanced concept of nepantla, from the Nahuatl language of the Aztec people. It’s a state of in-between-ness, a liminal space where multiple realities simultaneously exist, and transformation can occur. It relates to both our individual journeys and our collective ones. Professor AnaLouise Keating worked closely with Anzaldúa. She describes it this way: “During nepantla, our worldviews and self-identities are shattered. Nepantla is painful, messy, confusing, and chaotic; it signals unexpected, uncontrollable shifts, transitions, and changes. Nepantla hurts!!!! But nepantla is also a time of self-reflection, choice, and potential growth....” This is an apt description of the times we are in. From the unique perspective of the in-between we are able to see beyond the limitations of the dominant society to imagine a world free of its constraints.

To sustain ourselves through the rigors of the in-between we must be rooted in something deep enough to hold us steady, rich enough to provide nurture, and wise enough to guide us.

There is strength in feeling our belonging to Life and to one another. A belonging beyond personality or proximity. This also means we may feel the anguish around us more acutely—the pain of other people, other life forms, of the planet. And this is where so many of us reflexively disconnect or distract ourselves. But try to stay with it for a bit. Breathe into the collective pain and let it and yourself be held by the larger Breath that breathes you, the Life within and beyond all life. This is the source of our authentic oneness, and of our capacity to transform the conditions of suffering and injustice. This is the indelible community of our human and more-than-human kin. It extends across time, beyond form and species. Root yourself in this as a lifeline. Listen for it in your bones. It is a daily, moment by moment practice of remembrance and embodiment. It will change you. And you will forget… and then remember again. That is the journey, and we are on it together.

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This post is adapted from my forthcoming book.

Photo by Nk Ni on Unsplash.